A) Jack is equally horrified and ecstatic annually when the pre-lit Christmas tree comes out of storage and once again takes it’s place in the corner of the family room. He fears it, yet he also loves it. One might conduct a fascinating psychological study on the dichotomy of emotions wrapped up in the advent of the Christmas tree at our house. Jack “helped” Jeff carry the tree in from the garage by sounding off a few enthusiastic courtesy grunts. He does this when we are lifting heavy things and he is not lifting anything, but watching us with amusement.
B) Family dinners with my extended family are not unlike eating in a raucous and deafening cafeteria, where one must be fast and scrappy in order to survive.
C) When it snows like two feet of snow in early November, it feels like Christmas.
D) Sundays at church with Jack make me want to scream and throw things in the chapel. But he is already doing that, so I refrain.
E) There is peace on earth when former sitters/therapists return from college to visit, and offer to take Jack on a sensory walk away from the chapel.
F) I think I may need to twist the arms of my support group friends into meeting weekly through November and December to help me face the holidays. They may be able to help me piece together the scraps of my mental “health.”
G) I shouldn’t count on finding any of the dozen or so tubs of frosting I purchased recently to have on hand. They will not be neatly stacked in the cold storage room, ready to top the sugar cookies I baked of a quiet(ish) moment on a Sunday afternoon. This is because they have ALL been secretly injested with a soup spoon, over an indeterminate period of time, by one unnamed person who lives in this house. We know who did it. He knows he did it. And believe me, he is completely without remorse.
H) This bullet features the nickname of the frosting tub offender. Ha!
I) If you are wondering to yourself why I didn’t simply whip up a batch of buttercream icing for the homemade sugar cookies, I have nothing polite to say to you right now.
J) It is almost possible to take a Sunday afternoon nap around here without risking the discovery of a Code Brown upon awakening. Just let Jack have the vacuum while you rest. You may not be sleeping because of the din, but you will always know where he is and what he is doing.
K) Babies in little bright green Adidas are ridiculously cute.
L) The new James Bond film is rad. It’s darker and less cheesy than many of its predecessors. Daniel Craig doesn’t toss out quips like, “he lost his head,” while pummeling the bad guys.
M) There is nothing sweeter than a sleepy, happy four-year-old, freshly bathed and tucked cozily into his bunk bed.