Someone asked me this week to describe myself with three or four words. I was being filmed at the time of the asking. It was determined (by me) that I basically should win the Oscar for Lamest and Most Awkward on Camera, Ever. I was a self-conscious, rambling train wreck. I go full-on Deer in Headlights when anyone pulls out a camera and starts filming and I can’t even put words together people.
Thinking back on what I said, it was quite dumb.
I need redemption, so here are A Few Words That Describe Me, with the benefit of no one rolling tape:
I’m that creeper who takes that thing someone said at church, or that story my family wants to forget ever happened, or that dysfunctional tale that probably shouldn’t ever be repeated, and I write about it. I can’t help myself. Sorry guys. It’s in my nature to refurbish the life experiences into stories in my head that become stories on the internet. Writing is better than therapy, and I love it so.
2. Skeptical & Unimpressed.
I know, this is two words, but they kind of go together. I am skeptical of anyone selling a quick fix and I am highly skeptical of things that are said to be all about ease. You don’t raise kids with disabilities and then fall for that “click your heels three times” business. Real life and real challenges do not have quick fixes. There are answers, but the pressing forward isn’t generally easy.
Likewise, I am unimpressed by bragging, gossiping, and snobbery. No thanks. I’m too caught up in real life with ACTUAL CHALLENGES to care. Does that make me snobby about gossips and braggarts? Hmm, good question. I’ll have to mull it over.
The guys have knocked the demure out of me. Life demands efficient and honest communication. I’ve learned to be direct and bold in advocating for my boys. It just works better. It’s a skill I’ve learned from Terra, Louise, Georgie, the Flakes, and others in my life. Just say what you actually mean. Feel free to temper it with kindness and humor. The end.
4. Quite Contrary.
I dislike Pinterest because everybody loves it. I am the only person in the universe who doesn’t like avocados and who doesn’t want guac on my Cafe Rio salad. When something is trending online, I don’t want to know about it because there is a good chance it will be super annoying. If I am told that I must do something, I will take care to definitely NOT do that thing. Opinions and snark run thickly through my veins. I could say that I can’t help it, but I don’t want to say that.
So there you have it, straight from the horse’s mouth.