Month: July 2017

Relief

While we were on vacation, I felt a deep sense of calm. This seems like an obvious way to feel while vacationing, but I haven’t before experienced it at this level. I was truly peaceful. Truman shrieked and wailed a number of times—it didn’t rile me. Charlie had rigidity issues relating to clothing and other minutiae, meanwhile I was a placid…

I Do Not Have Three Children. I Have Four.

You know that feeling when you have a night of no sleep, bookended by two big, busy days, that all merge into one enormous travel day/night/day of deep confusion and harrowing sleep deprivation? That’s where I am now. But one really doesn’t feel that one can complain about post-Hawaiian vacation jet lag and the cruelty of the red-eye flight that…

Mind Fog; Neglected Blog

This somewhat neglected blog has been on my mind—the same mind that struggles to hold a thought, but then occasionally grabs onto a disconcerting idea and clutches it with a death grip. That’s how my brain seems to be working as I continue the grief voyage. Anyway, the blog. It’s kind of being ignored. Not intentionally, but I’m still trudging…

Pleasant Surprises

My friend Ann is encouraging the practice of memoir writing among the population at large by posting regular writing prompts. I approve of this. Today, she encouraged all the people everywhere to write about a time they were pleasantly surprised. Here are my thoughts. Since Jack left our home, I’ve been on that oft-used metaphorical emotional roller-coaster. Some days are…

Good Enough Will Do

I’ve started pulling back from checking in on Jack. I still have plenty of contact with the director, but I’m not texting her every day to see how he is doing. I need this space for my sanity. If he can’t be here physically with us, then I can’t torment myself with daily bits of out-of-context information. The sadness is still…

People are Good

It’s been six weeks since Jack left our home. Is it getting easier? Yes, in some ways, except when I worry about him and wonder if he is sad or feeling unloved and then I have a cry-fest. The true answer is that the dynamic of our home is completely different, so just living is definitely easier. Family life is…