We visited Jack today, which was
E) Bittersweet (because I had to leave him again)
F) Emotional (see above)
Since returning home, I have said out loud, multiple times, “If there were any other way, I would have done it,” to which Jeff unironically said, “There was no other way.”
I would have done anything to keep Jack at home with us. We did try everything. Nothing worked.
There was no other way.
Seeing Jack happy and healthy and content today boosted me. I’m happy with his new school and with how much improved his behavior is there. We had lunch at the park. We played at his house and explored the backyard.
But leaving Jack two hours away is not easy. I am thinking ahead to Thanksgiving and Christmas, and I feel conflicted and a little depressed.
Life is complex.
We are complex.
It’s not bad, it’s just the way it is.