Jeff and I spent 75 minutes on the phone this morning for Jack’s intake meeting with his new service provider.
This is where we tell them stuff—like that Jack adores vacuums and going for rides in the car, and that he straight up cannot handle crowded, noisy places, particularly which involve waiting in line (Someday I will tell you about the time I took Jack to Disneyland, for real. And we lived. I know.) We mention things at these meetings like “you will need to put up plywood on his bedroom walls so he doesn’t kick holes in the drywall and constantly pick at it.” And “Jack does great with big burly male staff, also watch ya noses (!) because his big hard head has been known to bash into them at times.”
You know, your basic info.
What goals do we have for Jack’s behavior? When they asked us this, Jeff mentioned getting him to wear shoes. I just wanted to say, “not hurting people or things.” Is it a tall order? Perhaps.
I felt one hundred percent calm and peaceful during this meeting. I have continued to feel settled and happy about Jack’s upcoming move to his new placement.
We told them all about the bad behaviors. We also told them how cute he is, and sweet, and purely loveable. Our support coordinator mentioned that he visited Jack this week and talked to a female staffer at his current home who has taken the brunt of Jack’s aggressive behavior, of late. During their conversation, she cried, saying she will simply miss him. This is a woman who could be glad to be rid of Jack and his behaviors. Instead, she was emotional, thinking of the real Jack—the person he is inside, who she loves.
Here is the thing: everyone loves Jack. Everyone who really knows him, loves him. He is so darling and precious, goofy and loving.
Everyone says such things about their own child, as they should. But Jack is FOR REAL darling and precious, in spite of those pesky behaviors.
He is TOTALLY goofy and loving, despite being nonverbal and developmentally delayed and frustrated.
Jacky is sweet. He is all bony elbows and giant feet and freckles and red hair and blue-green eyes and sweetness.
He is good, even when his behavior isn’t.
Jack is perfectly himself and I cherish all of him.